The PURPLE PINUP GURU PLATFORM Life in POVERTY UPDATE

It's been a real bitch for the PP Guru to find any gainful means of employment lately. Due to increasing credit card debt and the price of living in general, the PP Guru has had to make a few sacrifices of late. So far, the PP Guru has had to pawn half of his DVD collection to make ends meet. So jetison out the airlock all of the HBO Box sets that the PP Guru had accumulated over the past four and a half years while he worked at the WB (except for the Sopranos- that you'll have to pry out of the PP Guru's Omerta sworn cold dead hands before he''ll give up those - which by the way, what did everyone think of last night's shocking cliffhanging sixth season premiere - did Uncle June really lose his marbles or what?) and other assorted rare box set goodies.

But hopefully, there is a light over this technicolor gold potless rainbow. The PP Guru has met with some very exciting potential employers the past few weeks that he has now really been pushing his resume out the extreme vacuum of Van Nuys airspace. One such company that has taken notice of the PP Guru's delicious talents is a publication called P3 Production Update . It's a very interesting slick magazine that caters to the movie industry in terms of pre and post production, the latest reviews of camera equipment and technology, and how to scout for locations, along with a smattering of odds and ends about software and trade shows. This month's issue has a profile on Robert Redford and his reflection ofwhen he started the Sundance Film Festival, which has now been going on for ten years. Although, that picture of Redford on this month's cover will make anyone cower in horror, seeing how decrepit and craggy his face is looking these days. If the PP Guru were to be hired, he would report as a assistant to the associate publisher, Sally Kemper, while working under the auspices of publisher James Thompson - who incidentally hails from the PP Guru's home turf of Morris County, New Jersey. While the PP Guru was fighting off mafia drug runners and giving up coming actresses a spin in his White blue striped Ford Pinto on the gritty streets of Vail Road- Mr. Thompson was playing varsity football and doing wrestling matches in Lake Haptacong High. So the PP Guru is looking forward to a follow up call on Wednesday. Other potential employers that the PP Guru has interviewed up include Warner Bros Records (no longer affiliated with Warner Bros Theatrical Enterprises), Entertainment Partners, Sony Pictures, and Nestle Chocolate (so the PP Guru has a Willy Wonka fetish, so sue him).

In other news, the PP Guru is once again talking to his *ahem* film star neighbor - on a limited basis. He was volunteered to help move some stuff into her garage, and although the PP Guru got a good king size boo boo on his knee when she dropped a wood cabinet on it - what can he say? He's trapped in unemployed limbo and she's the only pleasant distraction out there to look at for the moment. The PP Guru reassures his adoring fleeting reading public that the romance has no chance of being rekindled again.

Well, at least he scored an old vacuum cleaner out of it.

Hi Ho Hi Ho - it's off job searching we go for the

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Coat