No! Not a Dream ! Not a hoax ! It's simply the return of ... STRANNNGGEE STIRRINGS (stirrings ... stirrings ... stirrings) BELOW (below ... below ... below) the PP GURU's BELT!! (belt ...belt ... belt)

Hey, is there a fucking echo in here? The PP Guru, figured that he would take a huge hefty bag break from the turmoils of his everyday existence at Peyote Place (see earlier entries - warts and all for details) and spend a long overdue weekend at his Papa PP Guru's hospitable high roller hacienda on the border of Las Vegas and Henderson, Nevada. So the PP Guru had made up some half crocked story to Paramount about his Papa PP Guru having to go to the hospital to get some stones removed (which is only a half-truth) and took a day off (not that the PP Guru could actually afford it - with the *Ahem* Film Star Neighbor's b-day coming up and all) and hopped on the Greyhound. The PP Guru would have liked to have hopped on a plane - but the credit cards are not as helpful as they used to be. Actually, the motive for the quick getaway plan was that the Papa PP Guru is a big fan of the X-Men movie franchise, of which, at the time of this memoir has nearly broken the Memorial Day weekend box office record by grossing over $ 107 million.


Not fucking bad. And it wasn't as bad as the critics made it to be.

Well, except for Cyclops buying the farm.

So we here at the Purple Pinup Guru Platform thought it would be in the best interest of the adoring blog readers that peruse this webpage as a cyber wee-wee pad for their pets if we were to resurrect one of our best 'outstanding' features:

Weekend cheesecake.

Because the belly dancers at the Morracan restaurant that the Papa PP Guru took PP Guru to last night just didn't cut it (although the shrimp scampi was heavenly). And if the belly dancers were so sexy as the ad in the Las Vegas Review declared, why was the Papa PP Guru so anxious to get back home and turn on HBO for the fights?

Well, the ten minute dances and big fake eyelashes was one reason.

Which is a good thing that the chicks in the X-Men: Last Stand movie brought on some good ol' metaphysical raging mutant woodies to the PP Guru ever increasing rupturing elastic tunics. It was as Mister Fantastic was down there working up the mystical mojo. But that's a different movie for another time.

And one doesn't really need a Prof X Cerebro crotch wake up call to tell you that Anna Paquin is the one primilary responsible for it.. Boy has she filled out her tunics.



But there's some other newbies as well...


Dania Ramirez....as the hottest Callisto that the PP Guru has ever seen? (Didn't Chris Claremont like base her on...Patti Smith, hairy armpits and all? Fox must have sent out the wrong casting call.)

Ellen Page as a fetching Kitty Pryde ....

as well as the return of our ol' Xavier's mutant institute of hot wenches.... Halle Berry as Storm (who has a great catfight with Callisto towards the climax of the film!!)


Famke Jannsen as the new improved Jean Grey and her new fiery life destroying persona of Phoenix ( she can now unbuckle belts and rips the pants off of hot men models just by thinking it!! Where does the PP Guru line up?)


And then there's Rebecca Romijn (who's now engaged to Sliders' (now Crossing Jordan) whimpy Jerry O'Connell, as if John Stamos wasn't bad enough) as the blue and shaved in all the right places Mystique.

Both the Papa PP Guru and the PP Guru enjoyed the film immensely, although there should have been more room to expand the characterizations of Kelsey Grammar's Beast and Ben Foster's Angel. (an extra half hour to the running time would have been perfect. Expanded director's cut maybe? ) Both just didn't seem to have enough screentime. The same could go to Vinnie Jones' version of the Juggernaut. His scenes with Kitty Pryde were the most humorous of the film.

Why kill off Cyclops? That was the major beef with the PP Guru. I know that Fox feels like blowing off steam on somebody for letting both James Marsden and Byran Singer to defect to the WB for Superman Returns - but why not just replace the actor? The PP Guru thought Brett Radnar (who was also in Vegas celebrating his b.o. triumph at the Bellagio according to LV Review's Norm page) had big shoes to fill and pulled it off admirably.

But still the PP Guru thinks that V for Vendetta is the comic book movie to beat this year and he doesn't think that Superman Returns is quite going to cut it.

But looking at the trailer for Ghost Rider,

Hmmmmm....

As seen through periscope eyes to Coat (who doesn't know how to use an elipses to save his life)