The Purple Pinup Guru Platform

When purple things are pulsating on your mind, I'm the one whose clock you want to clean. Aiding is Sparky, the Astral Plane Zen Pup Dog from his mountain stronghold on the Northernmost Island of the Happy Ninja Island chain, this blog will also act as a journal to my wacky antics at an entertainment company and the progress of my self published comic book, The Deposit Man which only appears when I damn well feel like it. Real Soon Now.

Thursday, April 19, 2007

Sparky beats the Guru (in a nice way)...

The wee Guru has found himself the victim of a beating from a group of teens. Why? Not known. We know the guru is broke.
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Battery (as in crime)

Criminal law
Part of the common law series
Elements of crimes
Actus reus · Causation · Concurrence
Mens rea · Intention (general)
Intention in English law · Recklessness
Willful blindness · Criminal negligence
Ignorantia juris non excusat
Vicarious liability · Corporate liability
Strict liability
Classes of crimes
Felony/Indictable · Hybrid offence
Lesser included offense
Crimes against the person
Assault · Battery · Robbery
Kidnapping · Rape
Mayhem · Manslaughter · Murder
Crimes against property
Burglary · Larceny · Arson
Embezzlement · False pretenses
Extortion · Forgery · Computer crime
Crimes against justice
Obstruction of justice · Bribery
Perjury · Misprision of felony
Inchoate offenses
Solicitation · Attempt
Conspiracy · Accessory
Criminal procedure
Criminal defenses
Other areas of the common law
Contract law · Tort law · Property law
Wills and trusts · Evidence
Portals: Law · Criminal justice

In many common law jurisdictions, the crime of battery involves an injury or other contact upon the person of another in a manner likely to cause bodily harm.

Battery is often broken down into gradations for the purposes of determining the severity of punishment. For example:

  • Simple battery may include any form of non-consensual, harmful or insulting contact, regardless of the injury caused. Criminal battery requires an intent to inflict an injury on another, as distinguished from a tortious battery.
  • Sexual battery may be defined as non-consensual touching of the intimate parts of another.
  • Family violence battery may be limited in its scope between persons within a certain degree of relationship: statutes with respect to this offense have been enacted in response to increasing awareness of the problem of domestic violence.
  • Aggravated battery is generally regarded as a serious offense of felony grade, involving the loss of the victim's limb or some other type of permanent disfigurement of the victim. As successor to the common law crime of mayhem, this is sometimes subsumed in the definition of aggravated assault.

In some jurisdictions, battery has recently been constructed to include directing bodily secretions at another person without their permission. In some jurisdictions this automatically is considered aggravated battery.

As a first approximation to the distinction between battery and assault:

  • the overt behavior of an assault might be A advancing upon B by chasing after him and swinging a fist at his head, while
  • that of an act of battery might be A actually striking B.

Within United States law, in most jurisdictions, the charge of criminal battery requires evidence of a mental state (mens rea).

Beating up

Beating up is systematic punching, or hitting with a blunt instrument, many times, with the design or effect of causing much pain. It often causes widespread heavy bruising, and sometimes more serious damage, sometimes permanent; and psychological damage. Frequently, to abet this beating, one or more accomplices restrain the victim, often two accomplices, by an arm each.

In the USA it is often called "beating up on".

The "up" started as having meaning "completely" or similarly, as in "writing up" or "cleaning up".

In law it is a type of battery (crime).

A severe beating-up is sometimes called "beating to (a) pulp", or less often "pulping".

Slang or euphemistic expressions for beating-up include "doing over", "working over", and "processing".

Beating-up is often used:

  • To enforce orders.
  • As punishment.
  • To prevent the victim from pursuing or raising an alarm.
  • To prevent the victim from resisting for a while afterwards during handling or transport.
  • Often, merely because the perpetrators, feeling angry against the victim, lose their mental restraints against violence, for example when security men beat up the tenth uncooperative drunk that they have to eject in the same evening.

Mugging is a type of street robbery, in which the perpetrator (the mugger) accosts the victim in a public place, such as a sidewalk, street or parking lot, and demands money and/or valuables through the use of force or fear. The robber will typically threaten to use a weapon such as a gun or knife, but mugging can also involve physically beating or killing the victim. Mugging differs from theft in its use of violence or intimidation.

The crime of mugging and its history

The term 'mugging' gained its current popularity in the United States, with New York infamously described in the 1970s as 'the mugging capital of America'. However, the crime is as old as history and among other things has been known as highway robbery, purse-snatching, or footpadding (which could be surreptitious or violent). In Victorian times the targets were wallets and gold watches, but in the US there was a big increase in reported street robberies and handbag snatches from the 1960s onwards as new consumer items became popular. In England the fashion for mugging either arose or gained popularity through many social factors in the late seventies and eighties, and became a cultural phenomenon among some urban youths. In some cultures, there was perceived to be a growing tendency for young males to steal from other young males. The principal targets became valuable and popular accessories like portable audio devices, cameras, laptop comuters, mobile phones, and other items that can be quickly and easily resold. Excitement, status, and gang initiation are undoubtedly important motives too. In larger United States cities and in the United Kingdom, the news media report and cover muggings as a crime trend, and some observers blamed the news media for a moral panic in England from the early 1970s at a time when “newspaper reporting of mugging(s) emerged and became increasingly sensational”[1] Nonetheless, as recorded crime statistics, insurance claims, and national crime surveys all show, street robberies remained a growing problem until they peaked at about the turn of the millennium. In many cases victims die when they struggled with assailants, through falling from moving buses or under vehicles, being knocked to the ground and hitting their heads on the sidewalk, being stabbed or shot, or beaten with blunt trauma force. More frequently, victims sustain lifetime orthopedic injuries which affect some level of disability, and impact labor and life activites.

Risk factors for vicitimization

-Conspicuous display by sidewalk pedestrians of resellable consumer items or indications thereof such as white iPod headphones.

-Preoccupation of sidewalk pedestrians by certain activities such as talking on a mobile phone. This activity is seen as a particualr risk factor because the vicitim is distracted by the conversation, typically has comprimised hearing and peripheral vision, and is conspicuously displaying a resellable item that can be quickly and easily converted to cash.

Mugger Modus Operandi

Some muggers operate alone. Others work sidewalks as a group of assailants, that many refer to as a wolfpack due to the simailarites to canine behavior and hunting technique. The wolfpack technique serves multiple purposes. At the moment of the incident the presence of multiple assailants first deters a solo victim from physically retaliating. Several wolfpack muggers dressed substantially similar can confuse a victim from making proper suspect identification at a police lineup if the perpetrators are arrested. Following the incident, several wolfpack muggers dressed substantially similar can also split up stolen merchandise and travel in different directions following their crimes to avoid police identification and arrest.

In many United States cities, muggers wear disguises integrated into clothing and accessories, such as hooded sweatshirts or hoodies. Others wear gradient lens glasses or stunner shades as a nighttime fashion accessory. Caps, and hats also serve as a change of disguise. As of 2006 and 2007, ski masks and balaclavas are making a comeback as a popular fashion accessory in some circles. As a basic operations technique, muggers attempt to blend into their surroundings as much as possible to aviod police detection following their crimes. To this extent many wear the local clothing style dejour. To the extent to which most other persons in their age group wear jeans, the mugger will also wear jeans, if most others wear white t-shirts and caps, the mugger will also wear such clothing to blend in and frustrate efforts to identify them. Most muggers that carry handguns will wear baggy and oversize clothing to avoid their gun "printing" through their clothing. 4XXL and 6XXL T-Shirts are not an uncommon size for a lean young mugger to wear to avoid having a gun print through his clothes. Many muggers will wear large jackets for the large pockets they feature to conceal stolen pocketbooks and other stolen personal items. Backpacks and "shopping" bags can also serve to conceal a purse until it can be ransacked, plundered, and ditched several blocks from the site of the mugging.

Most muggers prefer dark areas as they serve the dual purpose of providing cover so that police and passerby will not notice their crimes. The dark lighting also serves to mitigate the victims ability to obseve and remember the mugger for later positive identification. Some muggers will kill their victims if they resist or attempt to resist the mugging.

Victim countermeasures

As self-defense measures, many victims carry powerful whistles, bright flashlights, to call attention to themselves. In some countries, others carry and train to use knives and other edged weapons and concealed handguns, as equalizers against younger, larger, and more physically powerful muggers. Others train in the martial arts to use their bodies as powerful self-defense weapons capable of deadly force if necessary to overcome a mugger. Still others focus on running and sprinting training and wear appropriate running shoes at all times to outrun muggers.

A less recognized choice many make is their place of residence, shopping, and business. They choose to live in a "safer" area in the belief they can isolate themselves from muggings this way. Many also choose a method of transportation that minimizes the possibility of mugging. Many urban dwellers ride bicycles to avoid being mugged while walking among other purposes. Others believe private cars will protect them.

Law enforcement abatement strategies

In the United States many law enforcement agencies routinely conduct robbery surveillance operations often involving undercover police officers posing as decoys. In the United Kingdom, surveillance cameras monitoring public areas are more common than in the United States and are in part intended to have a deterrent effect.

Criminal prosecution

In many of the United States,mugging or street robbery is generally legally considered to be the felonious taking of money, personal property, or any other article of value, in the posession of another, from his person, or immediate presence, and against his will, accomplished by means of force or fear. A person is also generally guilty of robbery if in the course of committing a theft, he inflicts serious bodily injury upon another or threatens another with serious bodily injury.

In many of the United States muggings or street robberies are prosecuted as felonies with penalties of victim restitution and incarceration, with lifetime incarceration, without parole, for the third felony conviction pursuant to the three strikes laws.

Popular culture

The mugger is a popular character in fiction and news.

  • In the film Flower Drum Song, the only part for a caucasian is that of a mugger, symbolizing one aspect of American values.


  1. ^ Hale, D. (1998). Popular Culture, Crime and Justice. Wadsworth Publishing Company, California.

What to do if you are being mugged:

"Do not shout "Help, police!" as studies have shown this causes police to flee from you while at the same time attracting even more muggers. If you want the mugger to be stopped shout "Hey, this guy is giving away free money!"

If you know martial arts, don't use them. Nine times out of ten a guy with a gun beats a martial arts expert, regardless of what you have seen in the latest Chuck Norris picture.

If someone in a car grabs your bag, let go. Each year three people are killed in drive-by bag snatchings. This is mainly because there are only about three people born each year stupid enough to hold onto their bag while they are being dragged around the streets of New York. If you wear a purse, do not wrap it around your neck thinking it will be harder to steal, or you will be person number four.

Do not put your wallet in your back pocket. Besides it being easier to steal, any chiropractor will tell you that it ruins your posture. It isn't very good for your pants either, so keep your wallet in your front pocket.

Common mugging methods:

A pickpocket never works alone; there are always at least three people: a blocker, a snatcher, and a shill. The blocker forces you to stand still long enough for the snatcher to grab your wallet and then pass it off to the shill in case you notice it is missing. If a person blocks your way, and pretends to move out of the way while still blocking you, there is a very high probability your wallet is being snatched. When this happens, if you immediately turn around and physically attack the person standing directly behind you there is a small chance you will get your wallet back, depending on whether the wallet has been passed off or not. This has worked at least once in the past.

If a person, for any reason, asks you to come into an alley, do not do it. The most common method is to suggest that you will be able to purchase a gold necklace for under ten dollars. It is very tempting to enter an alley for such a good deal, but rest assured you have better chances getting a lawyer to worry about morals than buying that necklace. If there are less than three armed people waiting for you in the alley then the person was new at the job.

Do not get involved with any betting on the street. Even if you, by some great miracle of chance, happen to win at any of the fine sidewalk betting tables, rest assured you will never be able to claim your winnings. Look about you as you walk past any of these, and note any people over two meters tall and 120 kilos. These people almost certainly are there to separate any lucky fellow from the table before the winnings are claimed.

If you feel a gun barrel in your back, it is okay to relax. Almost every time, it turns out that this "gun barrel" is really just a short piece of piping. However, due to the small chance it is not a pipe it is a good idea to hand over your wallet anyway. New York is surpassed only by Washington DC and Dallas for its murder rate, and Washington DC doesn't count because that's where all the politicians are."

I've been mugged

Here's how to deal with being done over.


A mugger is someone who intends to rob you, often with the threat of assault, which makes it hard to be prepared in any way. Even so, it's vital that your personal safety comes first, so think before you act. Do you put up a fight, make a big noise, attempt to run away or just submit to their demands? Only you can decide, based on the situation as it unfolds, just don't do anything that increases the risk of getting hurt.

Choosing to comply without resistance won't make you less of a victim, or weaken your case in any way. What counts is that you protected yourself in the best way you could, and anyone from family and friends to the police will recognise that and respect you for it.

Just don't be tempted to tool up with a weapon of any kind. Even if you feel it's for self-protection, the law doesn't see it that way. If anything, it can only increase your risk of attracting more trouble.


If you've just been mugged, attacked or if you've just seen a crime being committed, then you should ring 999 as soon as possible. Even if you don't have much recollection of what happened, it could still mean the perpetrators are brought to justice before anyone else is forced to go through the same traumatic experience as you.

If you've been relieved of valuable items, like mobile phones or digital organisers, contact your insurance company and find out if you're covered under the terms. Some insurers will stump up for theft of valuables outside the home, but sadly most do not without prior arrangement and additional premium.


Being mugged is a traumatic event. It can trigger a range of strong emotions that may be hard to handle and can even change over time. The bottom line is that whatever you're feeling is fine, from shock to anger, isolation and depression, but in every case it helps to open up about it. Confiding in someone you trust, from a close friend, a family member, or even a counsellor can help you get things in perspective, and allow you to move on with your life.


If you are injured, get medical attention as soon as you can. Treat yourself very well as you may be in shock. Have your injuries documented as you may wish to claim compensation at a later date.

Stolen items

Cancel any stolen bank or credit cards as soon as you can, and change the locks for your house if your keys were taken. If your mobile was stolen then use TheSite's guide to having your phone blocked. Doing this quickly will prevent the crooks from running up bills in your name.

The Guru should post next — but next I talk of resources one can use to protect oneself. - Sparky


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