The Purple Pinup Guru Platform

When purple things are pulsating on your mind, I'm the one whose clock you want to clean. Aiding is Sparky, the Astral Plane Zen Pup Dog from his mountain stronghold on the Northernmost Island of the Happy Ninja Island chain, this blog will also act as a journal to my wacky antics at an entertainment company and the progress of my self published comic book, The Deposit Man which only appears when I damn well feel like it. Real Soon Now.

Wednesday, July 14, 2004


What is it with the world's obsession with capturing renegade cripples? Now that we've located a Osama Bin Laden aide and it turns out that he's nothing more than a wheelchair bound paraplegic? Didn't Israel a few months back also lodged a cruise missile at a handicapped equipped van killing some Palentstine leader who was being forced fed through a tube? So this is who we're on the lookout for the past few months out in the desert- some schmuck navigating his way through crevices of craggy mountains on a remote control wheelchair just for being shown on a videotape laughing alongside Osama when he received news about the planes hitting the towers on 9/11?

It's a glorious euphoria getting off on our Dr. Strangelove kicks.

I got a feeling that the October surprise that has the nation spellbound with dog drool will most conveniently occur during the Democratic convention or just right before the November election (if our shadow schmoes in the oval office funded by the the average pillaged taxpayer allow one to happen) will be the ballyhooed apprehension of Osama Bin Laden..........'s coffin. That's right. Osama will be arrested or at least his coffin will be substituted and escorted in handcuffs because this is what Ashcroft likes to do...arrest wooden characters since they're stiff as a board. Because they're all a bunch of sleazy Pinnochios as far as I'm concerned. I can see the CNN headline footage now...troops on live television surrounding a gravesite or a hole in the ground and ordering it whoever is down below to come up with their hands up and to our shock and dismay - a wooden crate suddenly emerges- it offers no resistance and surrenders peacefully while gives them that 'plank' look. It would be fucking like be something out of a Monty Python sketch. Lately, I've been feeling that Osama is nothing more than a twenty-first century version of The Piltdown Man. Don't ask me why.

Switching subjects-

'Tis the day before the receiving of the new Deposit Man issue from the printers. I'm sort of excited and I'm full of skeptical dread too.
I'm now getting cold feet and the apprehensive cynicism is beginning to materialize that maybe I should've postponed it for another convention. But I had obligations, not only to myself in getting things out on a timely manner, but trying hard not to let down a sponsor in getting the word of mouth out on their product as well- so I guess I'm going to have to roll with the punches on this and hope that the concluding chapter really pays off for the mini-series, because I've got this gut wretching feeling that the third book will satisfy and reward each reader who has stuck through it by sucessfully wrapping up the loose ends to a logical conclusion while still maintaining the cryptical bedside manner.

Since I write these scripts three or four years in advance, I have yet to go back and alter a few scenes here and there to make sure that the themes explored are fresh and current before the final draft is mailed to Canada. And that's one goal I aim to do before boarding that Amtrak for the San Diego Comic Con next Wednesday (BTW: my table in the small press area is R 12): is to bang out yet another rewrite of ACT III for Larry to start drawing AND at the same time, have Oliver read the script simultaneously so we can cut down on the debates (although they're sort of unavoidable) as we're putting in the dialogue.

Today is a good day at work as well, as I got two paychecks to deposit in the bank, one has overtime on it and the other is my vacation check- but I have a bonus third check to deposit from selling off some shares of stock. Plus, I have to pinch myself from dreaming that some stupid credit card company (partly owned by some Saudis by the way) was stupid enough to hand me over a platinum card with a $5,000 limit!!

What the fuck is wrong with these people? And I must be equally fucking nuts enough to accept it. And if I act now, I have another card issued by Disney or a card in which Disney has lent it's mouse likiness to it that has another $2,000 limit- but the cash advance is only $400.00. I suspect there is a cash limit on the BIG card - but I'm going to call to find out.

I just need them for the con in addition to my other two cards- but I promise myself that I'm going to pay them off and ditch em once I get back- - - hold on, maybe on second thought I may be needing to finance the third book with something - Hey, I should keep one around for safekeeping, just in case.

I want to touch briefly on my FREE COMIC BOOK DAY booty- not to be an ass about it, but some comics are not worth it even if they are free.

Take IDW's one for example: A sampler of most of their TV licensed properties that includes THE SHIELD, CSI, and 24. I'm not one to toot the TV SHOW COMIC BOOK BANDWAGON- it's just a waste of my personal time after I was duped into collecting the Topps X-FILES for the sheer collectability. I think I have two or three copies of the first issue and seen it grow to be worth about $50 only to see sink like a stone to be about $5.00.

The only good purpose these books do is whet your appetite for more ONLY WHEN THE SHOW IS ON HIATUS - otherwise what's the point? You have thirteen episodes in a given season if you're a cable pro such as the SHIELD and twenty two or more if it's a network show. In the case of CSI, jeez, you already have two spin-offs that air twice a week- isn't that enough caffeine for the junked up tv viewer? Is there any merit to all this other than to oogle at a artist's likeness of a certain favorite actor or actress? And 24 is just not adaptable to the medium - it just simply looks and reads like crap, like as if you walked in on the middle of something - but then again, that's what people say about my work too. Never understood the value of this side of the genre. However, there is a original seven page sample story of Steve Niles' 30 Days of Night (would you believe I saw someone in Ralphs' today proudly displaying this series on a t-shirt?) which I heard just got optioned by Sam Raimi to develop and direct before he begins his next Spider-Man movie.

This is also why I'm not attracted to too much Dark Horse product- they also go ape shit over licensed television and movie properties like Planet of The Apes (or used to when the Burton movie was in vogue) Buffy, Angel, and I swear that nearly half their entire line is devoted to those sweaty light sabering masturbating fan blownuts of Star Wars !! So wouldja' believe that their free offering this year is none other than...SURPRISE!!- a STAR WARS CLONE WARS SAMPLER rather than a free book of Hellboy - a orginial property that seemed to have done well for them at the box office.

I've never been exposed to the Cartoon Network's Clone Wars five minute shorts on which the contents in this issue is based upon- I've been tempted to pick up a bootleg copy at a convention or two- but piracy hasn't been gelling with me of late now that a entertainment company is signing my paycheck, but nevertheless, I wish there was some explanation or some summary of what's gone on before this story other than saying that the events of this story take place five months after the battle of Geonosis. What the fuck do I know what took place on Geonosis? Someone should enlighten me- and not alienate me if you want to gain a new reader to the fold. Other than that, the story is straightforward- just another typical fending off of a tyrannical empire on a poor old planet drenched in a cartoony look.

I'll get back to you on the good freebies next time -

Which just happen to be:

Oni's Love Fights by Andi Watson

Slave Labor Stories

About Comics Wild About Comics featuring the DNA Agents, Crossfire, etc;

Image Comics Summer Special

Gladstone's Uncle Scrooge & Mickey Mouse

Beckett Comic's the Ballad of Sleeping Beauty.




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