The Purple Pinup Guru Platform

When purple things are pulsating on your mind, I'm the one whose clock you want to clean. Aiding is Sparky, the Astral Plane Zen Pup Dog from his mountain stronghold on the Northernmost Island of the Happy Ninja Island chain, this blog will also act as a journal to my wacky antics at an entertainment company and the progress of my self published comic book, The Deposit Man which only appears when I damn well feel like it. Real Soon Now.

Monday, June 13, 2005

PP Guru:

NOT AN ITEM! Not being up to Blog snuff nor any long winded bloggersations- the PP Guru is going to go lite today. The PP Guru had a grand time @ the Porcupine Tree show and had heard that it got a glowing review in this morning's LA Times Calendar section. However, the PP Guru's date whatshername didn't have a great time, as evident that she got up to leave in the middle of Porcupine Tree's set. Her excuse was that she had to pick up a neighbor's dog from the vet.

How ghastly unoriginal.

Alas, The PP Guru was probably better off anyhow- she didn't illuminate very many positive vibes as the PP Guru felt that she didn't pass his screening process too well. She didn't particularly set off the heartstrings when the PP Guru probed her about how many jack and sodas would it take after the show to get her on all fours and maul like a pitbull. Inspecting the FDA approval stamp on the PP Guru's salami was definitely not on the list of things to do listed on her palm pilot. From what little info that the PP Guru could pry out that wasn't in between her legs was that she has a daughter that's graduating from high school next week - so that would give you a estimate of age range this woman was. Although she claims to heard of Porcupine Tree, one sour look on her puss would tell you a different story, as if she didn't really want to be there.

Oh well, the PP Guru would surmise that it's back to the old endorsements when you can get your proper nutrition the drug dealer way? . Just make sure when you have those special sleepovers with those five dollar sniff your crotch buddies that you break out the cherry Pop TARTS for a complete balanced diet. Or makeover. Take your pick.

ITEM! The PP Guru is still awaiting word from his record ordering buddy over at the Central Perk store when and if he's ever going to get his copy of the new Arena, Marillion, or Dprp roundtable review without listening to it first in order to form his own opinion. So Hurry the fuck up special record order person at the Central Perk store, I want to listen to it this weekend. Whatever you do, Don't push that shiny red button PP Guru - it's the history eraser button.

ITEM! After this year's devastating San Diego Comic Con International - (the reason why the PP Guru says it will devastating - because he will be devastatingly broke by the time it's over) the PP Guru will have to save all his sage engraved wooden Indian head nickels to see the Steve Howe/Chris Squire/Alan White solo tour that will be making a pit stop at the Wiltern Theater on August 5th (not the Wilshire where the PP Guru saw Porcupine Tree last weekend). In case you live in the Harpo Marx netherworld, (and the PP Guru would not laugh if you did) all three listed above comprise of three fifths members of the most virtuoso and classically trained group ever to live in modern times called Yes.

They will also be joined by one album wonder player, Geoff Downes who left after the 1980 Drama tour to form the one of the biggest AOR pop power bands ever to walk the scales of the Billboard album charts, for tour information in your city.

ITEM! Finally, the new ( or the PP Guru should say the latest- it's now two months old- but the PP Guru would assume that many of you disciples are used to old green moldy bread and sour milk in your all your portable cooling storage spaces ) Deposit Man & the Last Great Gate of Mortality Act III will be distributed in this September's FM International distributor catalogue.

Yeah, yeah, yeah- so it's been a fucking while. What the hell do you want from the PP Guru? He hadn't had time to get to it when they was shitloads of OT making his personal life miserable. Now with the OT gone, the PP Guru's life is even more miserable. Unless he has a credit card to max out.

Somedays The PP Guru just can't win. Well, most of them anyway.

As faxed via courier pigeon to:

~ Coat

Sparky smirks "Hippy!"


  • At 8:14 AM , Blogger Coat said...


    It appears that this post suffered from some real hard core technical difficulties.

    I was raving about Hemp cereal, folks.

    And it's the new Dream Theater album, I'm eagerly awaiting to get for a discount.

    I'm glad I'm not the only one these clitches happen to.



  • At 8:14 AM , Blogger Coat said...

    Oops- I meant to say glitches.


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