The Purple Pinup Guru Platform

When purple things are pulsating on your mind, I'm the one whose clock you want to clean. Aiding is Sparky, the Astral Plane Zen Pup Dog from his mountain stronghold on the Northernmost Island of the Happy Ninja Island chain, this blog will also act as a journal to my wacky antics at an entertainment company and the progress of my self published comic book, The Deposit Man which only appears when I damn well feel like it. Real Soon Now.

Friday, April 28, 2006


Things to do this weekend:

Since the PP Guru is now out of his self imposed unemployed incarceration, he can go out, partake in the fresh air, sniff the flowers, sing with the birds, and step firmly and squatly upon the road apples left by Trigger the night before. He can also be seen in the public eye without bing shun upon like a leper.

And that means this weekend- it's time once more for the annual - (whatever it is, the PP Guru lost count) Los Angeles Times Festival of Books that's taking place tomorrow and Sunday on the University of Los Angeles campus.

All the usual suspects will be there in attendance - most notably Robert Crais whom Sparky profiled earlier this week. He will be having a frank discussion with Michael Connelly on Saturday. Ray Bradbury, T. Jefferson Parker, Chip Kidd, Stephen Cannell, as well as many notable mystery authors will be under the canopy of spring flowers and sunshine. Other celebs slated to appear will be Carl Reiner, Ray Harryhausen, Larry Flynt, Teri Garr, and the unfortune screeching harridan Dr. Laura (who'll want to share her imagined sexual scars with all).

Personally, the PP Guru is going for the $1.00 Fish Tacos at Rubio's - that is, if the indominable fat ass Dom DeLuise doesn't run over the PP Guru with a golf cart beforehand in his mad rush for the popular Baja mex stand and gobbles them all up.

Speaking of Ray Harryhausen- the master model maker will also be appearing at this Sunday's Los Angeles Science Fiction and Comic Book Convention now held whenever Bruce Schwartz feels like it. The PP Guru is going to maybe meet up with his some of porn star associates like Tiger Lily and Linda Tran and peruse through the aisles in search of cheap Marvel Essentials and DC Showcase trades.

The PP Guru has been having a torrid love affair with big thick phone book sized reprints of early seventies comic book nirvanas. Stuff that may have been left open ended when the PP Guru was nothing more than a PP Guruette Eagle scout.
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DC has jumped on the bandwagon of offering affordable 500 page plus reprints of some obscure material such as the entire Jonah Hex adventures collected into one volume. The PP Guru just ate it up.

He also bought the Superman and Green Lantern volumes and is eager to pick up more.

There's the House of Mystery and the Haunted Tank volumes coming soon. The PP Guru is aiming to to get his mitts on the Justice League and Teen Titans volumes this weekend. It seems that DC offers the better value in terms of page count.

Some volumes can run close to 600 pages for $ 16 or $ 17 a book- plus it's mostly stuff that the PP Guru wasn't allowed to touch back then- because the PP Guru would only associate with Marvel Zombies back in the mid-seventies and it would be blasphemy to possess a DC comic back in the day- but now it's safe to go outside.

Not that Marvel isn't offering a few choice volumes themselves in the Essential series. The PP Guru wouldn't mind getting ahold of the Defenders, Moon Knight, or the Nova volumes.

Next- the PP Guru DVD wish list - volume 2. ~ Coat

Funny how the Guru doesn't get how pictures sell a blog ... - Sparky

Thursday, April 27, 2006

Sparky: Tech you hold -

Us guys love gadgets -

BusinessWeek: Sounding like a corporate PR wonk -Jack Ewing: Nokia Puts Your Digital Life in Your Hand

“The handset maker introduces phones designed to do everything your video camera, computer, and iPod do. And they're always nearby.

Marko Ahtisaari, Nokia's director of design strategy, sometimes begins the day by diving into a Finnish lake still partly covered in ice. He calls that a disruptive experience, and it's a metaphor for what Nokia (NOK) is trying to do in the consumer electronics business. On Apr. 25, Nokia introduced new versions of its N series handsets, which mark the company's latest encroachment onto turf now occupied by outfits such as Sony (SNE), Canon (CAJ), and Apple (AAPL).

If you are old fashioned enough to call these devices "phones," Nokia people will politely correct you. They are multimedia computers, which offer features and picture quality to rival digital cameras or camcorders, and music quality to challenge an iPod. And because they can connect to the Internet you can check e-mail, download songs, or even update your blog while on the go. (Thought the world already had enough blogs? Think again.)

The high-end N93 will hit stores in July and retail for $660. (Wireless service providers may offer deals to get that price down.) An upgrade of the existing N90, it moves Nokia further into camcorder territory. The new version can record 90 minutes of video and adds features such as the ability to connect directly to a TV for full-screen viewing. ...

Should anyone miss the point, Nokia's press extravaganza in a spiffed-up Berlin warehouse ended with a video in which the camera slowly panned across a tableau of dusty, discarded electronic equipment -- including digital cameras and a cobweb-covered iPod. ... ”

EnGadget counters: "We don't know much about what's going on here, but from our broken translation we can glean that there's another Nokia N-series device out there somewhere — perhaps the successor to the N92? — that appears to have a rather chubby 3 megapixel autofocusing 3x zoom camera, DVB-H functionality, and may also feature HSDPA / UMTS / EDGE, 802.11g, and Bluetooth 1.2. Anyone else seen this thing floating around?"

SE P990
How this is different from the near Newton-y goodness of a Sony PDA phone would cause thought. At last. After all the leaked photos, Sony Ericsson really had no choice but to officially announce the P990 "well ahead of availability." This 3G (UMTS) smartphone has the same dimensions as the P910 but adopts the Symbian OS 9.1 and UIQ 3 software platform while throwing down with WiFi (802.11b), Bluetooth, a 2 megapixel camera with "photo light," video calling, FM radio, MP3 and MPEG-4 player, and keyboard (QWERTY, QWERTZ, AZERTY, or Russian) underneath the flip-down keypad. Web browsing is accomplished in landscape mode on the 2.8-inch QVGA screen using the new Opera 8 browser and is "prepared for all major push e-mail clients." The unit ships with 80MB free memory and a 64MB Memory Stick Pro DUO card in the box. The P990 will drop in Europe and Asia in Q1 2006. It will with a 4GB Memory Stick Pro DUO card.
Your Sparky went old school and has the P910i, when all said and done - it isn't as cheap or as versatile as Warren Ellis' Digital Box if you already have a phone. If not - go with the box, I'm trying to get ahold of a Windows PC so I can get this to play movies in portrait or landscape mode on my phone.

Quickly and easily done - eh? - Sparks

Wednesday, April 26, 2006


It's certainly a euphoric explosion in the PP Guru's purple crotch tunic to be a productive member of the ENTERTAINMENT BUSINESS workforce once more. As Sparky may have eluded in a couple days past- the PP Guru is now a member of the Paramount Pictures labor elite in helping with box office analysis and helping out with the shitstorm melee of box office returns on Mission Impossible Three and Over the Hedge (which the PP Guru has been told will be the last official Dreamworks film to be released under their own auspices before Paramount cleans up ship). So it's a match that's makes perfect sense.

PP Guru....

Paramount Pictures...

Once again....

PP Guru....

Paramount Pictures.
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So, while the PP Guru is busy catching on past due notices and Les the Landlord who wants to throw him out., the PP Guru may have a few sheckles lying around. There's a lot of prog coming out or has come out that PP Guru wants to get. Even though it's been out for little over a month and the PP Guru had to sit out on the David Gilmour extravanganza that recently invaded the Los Angeles area (the $100 plus ticket prices at the Kodak and the Gibson Universal Ampitheater didn't help matters many- that's why the PP Guru opted for the Jon Anderson show a few weeks ago). David has put out his first solo album in some twenty odd plus years called On a Island and the PP Guru doesn't have it yet. He's heard it's quite good and that it has Crosby, Stills, and Nash doing back up vocals on it. The PP Guru has to get it.

Another band that the PP Guru has read about in the LA Times of all places about a group from Manchester, England called Elbow. The concert review made mention of lead singer Guy Garvey being compared as a Peter Gabriel/Genesis wannabe - now, you know how the PP Guru is quite partial to things pertaining to giant hogweeds and carpet crawls that he is inticed to pick up the band's latest, Leaders of the Free World on V2 records just on that recommendation alone. Now the PP Guru had found out that the band has been around since 2000. Where the fuck was the PP Guru, sleeping in Paris somewhere? The PP Guru has to get it.

More offerings from that wonderful German label Insideout Music include the new double CD Flower Kings - Paradox Hotel (as well as leader Roine Stolt's latest double CD solo album Wall Street Voodoo ), Stream of Passion featuring Ayreon's Arjen Anthony Lucassen and Marcela Bovio, the long awaited follow-up to OSI's debut album, Free that comprise of Mike Portnoy, ex-Dream Theater keyboardist Kevin Moore, and Fate's Warning Jim Matheos, and new bassist Joey Vera- sadly Steven Wilson did not help out on this one, and yet another good album is coming forthwith from that other hard rocking band from Canada (other than Rush) Saga.

But the one that has the PP Guru searching hi and low throughout the bins of the local Sherman Oaks Tower Records and Border's is the soaring debut of a new Yes offshoot band called White featuring Alan White (duh) and Geoff Downes. Recorded last summer in Seattle, originally this material on the album was supposed to make it's debut at last summer's aborted More Drama Tour which was also supposed to feature Chris Squire and the Syn and a solo acoustic set from Steve Howe before bringing down the house with a set of songs from Drama that haven't been performed since 1980. So the album has been released by Renaissance Records and it sports a stunning new shiny Roger Dean album cover. Unfortunely, the PP Guru is unable to supply a variable link for all to see. But, you know the PP Guru has to get it- otherwise, he'd lose face in keeping up with his civil prog rock duties.

More PP Guru tomorrow - if time allows. ~ Coat

Elbow (band)

Origin Manchester, England
Years active 1990–present
Genre(s) Alternative rock
Label(s) V2
Members Guy Garvey
Mark Potter
Craig Potter
Richard Jupp
Pete Turner

Elbow emerged from the late 1990s Manchester music scene centred around the city's vibrant Northern Quarter on Oldham Street.

Acclaimed for their innovative sound, breathtaking live gigs and the candid, evocative lyrics of singer Guy Garvey, Elbow have received vast critical acclaim and been endorsed by major artists REM, U2, Velvet Underground[citation needed] and Blur. However, commercial success has yet to match their critical acclaim and cult status.

Singer Guy Garvey met guitarist Mark Potter at Sixth form college in 1990 at the age of 16. Mark asked Guy to sing in a band he was in with drummer Richard Jupp and bassist Pete Turner and they formed SOFT. Mark's brother Craig Potter joined soon after on keyboards. By 1997 they had changed their name to Elbow, signed a deal with Island Records and recorded their debut album with producer Steve Osbourne. However, when Island was bought out by major label Universal, the band were dropped in a mass cull and their album never released.

They continued to record on the iconic independent label Uglyman, and released The Noisebox EP and The Newborn EP, which was given extensive airplay by BBC Radio 1 .

Their debut album, Asleep in the Back, released on V2 in 2000, was hailed as a seminal album of the new millennium, gaining them a Mercury Music Prize nomination and a Brit award nomination. Their second album, Cast of Thousands - a reference to their performance at Glastonbury in 2002, when they recorded thousands of people singing "We still believe in love, so fuck you", sealed their reputation as innovators in UK music.

In 2004 Elbow went on an unofficial tour of Cuba, becoming the first British band ever to play a concert outside Havana. The tour was made in to a short film by British documentary maker Irshad Ashraf.

Elbow's innovation in the studio has invited work with other bands, notably Editors and I Am Kloot whose debut album was produced by Guy Garvey. Their third album, Leaders of the Free World, was entirely self produced at Blueprint studios in Salford, a space the band hired for the duration of their recording sessions, teaming up with video artists The Soup Collective to produce an integrated music and video DVD.

They have contributed the song "Snowball" to the 2005 War Child benefit album Help: a Day in the Life Guy also returned to I Am Kloot as co-producer for their single Maybe I Should and Guy Garvey continues to work closely with Manchester Indie Label Skinny Dog

Band members


Studio albums

Positions listed are for the UK Album Chart:

1. Asleep in the Back (May 7, 2001); #14

2. Cast of Thousands (August 18, 2003); #7

3. Leaders of the Free World (September 12, 2005) #12

UK singles & EPs

All positions are from the UK Singles Chart:

Early releases:

  • "Newborn" (2000)
  • "Any Day Now" (2001)

From Asleep in the Back:

  • "Red" (2001) #36
  • "Powder Blue" (2001) #41
  • "Newborn" (2001) #41
  • "Asleep in the Back"/"Coming Second" (2002) #19

From Cast Of Thousands:

  • "Fallen Angel" (2003) #19
  • "Fugitive Motel" (2003) #44
    • "Ribcage"/"Fugitive Motel" limited edition "7 (2003)
  • "Not a Job" (2004) #26
  • "Grace Under Pressure"/"Switching Off" (2004)

From Leaders Of The Free World:

  • "Forget Myself" (2005) #22
  • "Leaders Of The Free World" (2005) #53
  • "My Very Best" (2006)

External links

Monday, April 24, 2006

Sparky: Rambling again ...

Did a reorganization of the sidebar - added Barry Eisler - the mystery/spy/assassin fiction writer - to our blog roll.

Barry Eisler

Barry Eisler, born 1964 in New Jersey is an author of fiction.

He undertook graduate studies in Jurisprudence at Cornell University and work for the CIA for three years.

He writes thrillers and is the creator of the John Rain series:

1. Rain Fall (2002)
2. Hard Rain (2003) aka Blood from Blood
3. Rain Storm (2004) aka Choke Point
4. Killing Rain (2005) aka One Last Kill
5. The Last Assassin (2006)
All of them are worth reading. Mine are signed by Barry and that makes me happy ...

To be fair - let's do a brief on Robert Crais too. As both the Guru and I like his books as well.

Robert Crais

Robert Crais is a contemporary American author of detective fiction. Crais began his career writing scripts for television shows such as Hill Street Blues, Cagney & Lacey, Quincy, Miami Vice and L.A. Law. His major literary influences are Raymond Chandler, Ross Macdonald and Robert B. Parker. Crais lives in California's Santa Monica mountains with his family.


Crais's usual protagonist and first-person narrator is private detective Elvis Cole, an archetypal wisecracking tough guy with a heart of gold and all the charm of his namesake, Elvis Presley. Almost as well known is Cole's partner Joe Pike, an intimidating ex-Marine who never smiles. Except for Demolition Angel, Hostage and The Two-Minute Rule, all of Crais's books feature Cole and Pike.

The author tackles a variety of subjects in his novels. Free Fall was inspired by the Rodney King riots and Sunset Express dealt with a killer who bore an uncanny resemblance to O.J. Simpson. The most frequently recurring theme in Crais's books is the value of honesty; in his works, the long-term value of coming clean always outweighs the short-term benefits of covering up the problem. Crais also delves into issues of family and loyalty.

Some readers have complained that Crais's style has veered into over-the-top melodrama in recent years and that each book has the same basic structure (usually leading to a shoot-out climax). Others insist that his increasingly cinematic storytelling is how he keeps getting better with every novel. Over the years, his novels have taken a turn for the darker side, with a greater cynicism being expressed in his writing, although the wit and humor of his earlier books are still present. His novels and characters have become more deeply realized, and his extensive use of flashbacks and dream imagery add a greater depth to the present-day narrative.

In March of 2005, Bruce Willis appeared in Hostage, the first Hollywood adaptation of one of his books. He refuses to sell the rights to Cole, Pike, and his other recurring characters, preferring to allow his readers to keep their own personal conceptions of the characters.


  • The Monkey's Raincoat -- Bantam -- 1987
  • Stalking the Angel -- Bantam -- 1989
  • Lullaby Town -- Bantam -- 1992
  • Free Fall -- Bantam -- 1993
  • Voodoo River -- Hyperion -- 1995
  • Sunset Express -- Hyperion -- 1996
  • Indigo Slam -- Hyperion --1997
  • L.A. Requiem -- Doubleday -- 1999
  • Demolition Angel -- Doubleday -- 2000
  • Hostage -- Doubleday -- 2001
  • The Last Detective -- Doubleday -- 2003
  • The Forgotten Man -- Doubleday -- 2005
  • The Two-Minute Rule -- Simon & Schuster -- 2006

External links

Robert also inspired Bialar Crais ...

Bialar Crais

Farscape character
Captain Bialar Crais
Title Captain
Homeworld Sebacean Farming Colony
Race Sebacean
Gender Male
Affiliation Peacekeepers; Independent; Talyn; Ally of Moya's crew
Portrayer Lani Tupu

Bialar Crais is a fictional character in the television science fiction series Farscape. The series' creator, Rockne O'Bannon, named the character after his friend, contemporary mystery novelist Robert Crais.

Played by Lani Tupu (who also provides the voice for the animatronic puppet character Pilot onboard Moya), Bialar Crais was born in a Sebacean farming community, but while still a boy, he and his younger brother Tauvo were taken from their family and conscripted against their will into the Peacekeeper military. As they were hauled away, Crais' father charged him to look after his younger brother. It was a burden Crais would always remember, one that would later come back to haunt him.

Peacekeeper for Life

Crais and his brother eventually dedicated themselves to their lives as Peacekeepers. Both rose through the ranks until Crais gained command of his own Command Carrier. It was a position rarely achieved by any Peacekeeper not born on a carrier, perhaps even the first such case. Tauvo, who had reached the rank of Lieutenant, served under Crais' direct command as a Prowler pilot.

Crais was able to use his position to pursue several scientific projects, one of which included the breeding of a Leviathan gunship under the supervision of Lt. Velorek. The project took place on the Leviathan Moya and led to the placement of the ship's current Pilot, after her first pilot was executed. The project eventually led to Velorek's execution after it was revealed that he was undermining its progress as well as Crais' first encounter with Officer Aeryn Sun. [1]

Two cycles later, Crais' battle group was transporting Moya to the prison colony Terren Ra, when the prisoners aboard Moya staged an escape. Crais ordered an attack on the Leviathan to stop them, and a number of Prowlers assaulted the overtaken Leviathan. During the fight, a wormhole opened in space and the Farscape One module, piloted by John Crichton, emerged. The module appeared directly in front of Tauvo's Prowler and he was unable to avoid collision. The impact knocked his Prowler out of control and into a nearby asteroid, destroying the ship and killing him. After taking Crichton's ship onboard, the prisoners, whom included Ka D'Argo, Pa'u Zotoh Zhaan, and Dominar Rygel XVI, managed to free Moya of her control collar and starburst away. Officer Sun's Prowler was caught in the ship's wake and pulled with it. When Crais learned of the accident, he believed that Crichton had intentionally rammed Tauvo's Prowler and murdered his brother. He pursued Moya to a nearby commerce planet and confronted Crichton and Aeryn on its surface, accusing Crichton of murder and threatening to dissect him for further study. When Aeryn attempted to defend Crichton, Crais declared her "irreversibly contaminated" for spending too much time with the unknown human, a charge that carried the sentence of death. As they were being transferred back to his carrier, John and Aeryn managed to escape back to Moya. Though Crais pursued with his Command Carrier, Crichton was able to use the planet's gravity to sling Moya to a velocity that allowed her to escape. Though he had lost him for now, Crais decided to pursue Moya outside of Peacekeeper space and into the Uncharted Territories in order to recover its prisoners and bring his brother's "killer" to justice. [2]

In the Uncharted Territories

Crais is the antagonist of John Crichton, who accidentally killed his brother in a collision of their two ships. Bent on avenging his brother's death, Crais pursues Crichton.

For the next cycle, Crais searched the Uncharted Territories for Crichton. During that time, he rediscovered the legendary Command Carrier [[Zelbinion]]. Not wanting to take time away from his search, Crais left a group of technicians to salvage what they could from the ship then left, planning to return for them later. While he was gone, the techs were attacked by Sheyangs and all but one technician, Gilina Renaez, were killed. The Zelbinion would later be discovered by Moya and boarded by her crew. They aided Gilina in partially repairing the ship and driving off the Sheyangs. Gilina agreed to keep her encounter with Crichton and his companions a secret from Crais when he returned. [3]

Later, Crais was pulled into a confrontation with Crichton by the malevolent entity Maldis. Though Crichton tried to reason with Crais, Maldis' influence drove Crais into a rage and he tried to kill Crichton with his bare hands. When Crichton got the upper hand, Maldis transferred Crais back to his Command Carrier. There, Crais was ordered by Peacekeeper High Command to cease his pursuit of Moya and return to Peacekeeper space. Crais ignored the order and murdered the only other officer who knew about it, his first officer Lt. Teeg. Crais had gone rogue. [4]

Throughout his search, Crais placed a number of wanted-beacons througout the Uncharted Territories in hopes someone would turn them in for a reward. The beacons also contained a message for Aeryn, offering her an honorable discharge if she returned to the Peacekeepers. Despite the beacons, his efforts to find them remained fruitless. [5]

Months later, Crais was informed by Scorpius that he had captured Crichton at his Gammak Base. Happy that Crichton was finally theirs, Crais took his carrier to the Gammak Base to retrieve Crichton. There, he aided Scorpius in interrogating Crichton in the Aurora Chair since Scorpius refused to hand Crichton over before he found certain information. The interrogation ended abruptly when they discovered a memory that showed Crichton giving Crais information on wormholes, exactly what Scorpius wanted. The memory was fake, created by Gilina, whom had been transferred to the Gammak Base. Scorpius used the Aurora Chair on Crais but instead of the wormhole information, he found Crais' memory of Teeg's murder. Realizing that the chair had been fooled, he stopped the interrogation. Before Crais was let out of the chair, however, he was found by Aeryn Sun. He ordered her to release him, but she refused. When he vowed to hunt her down and kill her as he had vowed to Crichton, she turned the chair to full power and left him to die. Crais survived, but was a broken man. His quest to find Crichton had become Scorpius' and the half-breed soon took Crais' Command Carrier as well. [6]


Following Scorpius' takeover, Crais realized that he would soon have to face the consequences of his decisions for the past cycle. When Rygel XVI turned himself in to the Peacekeepers to betray the crew of Moya, he made a deal with the Hynerian. He would help them escape if they granted him asylum from the Peacekeepers. Rygel agreed, taking Crais with him back to Moya. Though reluctant to let him onboard, Crichton and his companions refrained from killing him and imprisoned him instead. It was then he finally faced Crichton on civil terms. He explained to Crichton that he had been wrong, that his pursuit had become more about him than his brother, and he apologized to John. Shortly after, Crais was released from his cell and taken to Talyn, Moya's newborn offspring and the successful outcome of the project he'd started nearly three cycles before. He quickly formed a bond with the young gunship and after Crichton, D'Argo, and Aeryn left to destroy the Gammak Base, he stole Talyn, devastating Moya.

Crais soon discovered he'd grabbed more than he bargained for. Talyn was difficult to control and too young to starburst. After helping save Crichton and D'Argo, he enlisted Aeryn's help to get Talyn to cooperate. After some difficulties, Talyn offered Crais the "hand of friendship" over Aeryn, to her objection. Crais was now neurally linked to Talyn and after forcing Aeryn off of the ship, he and Talyn starbursted away. [7]

With Talyn

For the next cycle, Crais and Talyn wandered the Uncharted Territories. Crais acted as a guide, a mentor, and a father to the developing Leviathan gunship. [8]

A few months after parting with Moya and her crew, Crais and Talyn encountered a Halosian vessel. Though they informed the Halosians that they travelled peacefully, the Halosians attacked. Crais ordered Talyn to fire in self defense, effectively crippling the Halosian vessel. [9]

Months later, Crais and Talyn contacted Moya. It was his intention to help Talyn become less aggressive and threatening to others by replacing his main cannon with non-lethal weapons. He planned to purchase them from Plokavians, but he needed the help of Moya's crew to install the weaponry. When the Plokavians arrived, however, Talyn fired on their ship, destroying it before again fleeing. It was later revealed that Talyn had detected a substance on the Plokavian ship that would have threatened Moya. He had destroyed the ship to protect his mother. [10]

At one point while under Scarran torture, Crichton would encounter a mental image of Crais. This image was cast in the role of an Australian beat cop. [11]

Crais and Talyn would again cross the paths of Moya and her crew after Talyn heard a call of distress from his mother. While Talyn helped Moya recover, Aeryn implored Crais to help them assault a Shadow Depository and save Crichton. Crais refused to allow Talyn to participate as he was hoping to steer the Leviathan away from violence. Talyn decided to return, however, and they destroyed the Shadow Depository with a single strafing run. After Crichton was recovered, Crais and Talyn accompanied Moya to a planet where she could be healed from severe burns and Crichton could have Scorpius' chip removed from his head. Crais and Talyn orbited and kept watch for any Peacekeepers. While they waited, Crais informed Aeryn that Talyn wanted someone else to help guide him along with Crais. Together, they had selected Aeryn. While Aeryn was gratified at the offer, she left to pursue Crichton after he escaped Moya. Aeryn was killed before she could ever give an answer. Her death devastated Crais and he attended her funeral before returning to Talyn. The distraction provided by her death also allowed Scorpius to reach the planet's surface undetected in a Marauder. After recovering Crichton's chip, Scorpius fled in the Marauder. Crais and Talyn pursued and destroyed the Marauder before it could reach Scorpius' Command Carrier, avenging Aeryn's death. Again Crais and Talyn starbursted away, believing both Aeryn and Scorpius to be dead. Both would eventually be false as Scorpius had not been onboard the Marauder and Zhaan would sacrifice herself to bring Aeryn back from the dead. [12] [13] [14]

Shortly after these events, Crais and Talyn were discovered and attacked by a Peacekeeper Retrieval Squad. Talyn managed to fight off part of the squad, but he was severely damaged by a Pantack Class Vigilante armed with an Immobilizer Pulse. Though they managed to escape, both Crais and Talyn were nearly killed and ended up drifting for days before Moya arrived, having received a signal from her son. When he was revived, Crais explained the situation and informed Aeryn that her mother, Xhalax Sun, was in command of the squad. Shortly afterward, a healed Talyn had to separate from Moya. Crais and Talyn were now joined by Aeryn, Rygel, Stark, and one of the twinned Crichtons.

They would travel together for several months, during which Crais would face his growing attraction to Aeryn, Talyn's persistent behavioral problems, and the ever threatening Retrieval Squad. At one point, Xhalax and her squad tracked Talyn to a planet where he was healing. When her squad failed to capture or eliminate Talyn, Crais, and their companions, she found herself at their mercy. Knowing Xhalax was too dangerous to leave alive, Crais offered to kill her so Aeryn didn't have to do so. Though he fired his weapon, making the others believe he had indeed killed Xhalax, he decided to spare her life and instead made a deal with Xhalax. He would allow her to live if Xhalax informed the Peacekeepers that Talyn and Crais were dead. Xhalax agreed, but this would not be the last time they would encounter her. After Crichton was killed on Dam-Ba-Da, Stark discovered Xhalax alive on Valldon. Though they believed that Crais had betrayed them, he eventually convinced them that his intentions were in everyone's best interests. Eventually, Crais killed Xhalax to save Aeryn, unaware that Aeryn had reconciled with her estranged mother.

After Moya and Talyn had reunited, Crais elected to join John and Aeryn in stopping Scorpius' wormhole program. As they enacted Crichton's plan, Talyn became more irrational, going as far as destroying an unarmed medical ship as well as firing on his own mother, Moya. Realizing that Talyn needed extensive repairs and modifications, Crais decided to shut down his companion and friend and bring him to the only people who could help him, the Peacekeepers. On the Scorpius' Command Carrier, Crais realized that the only way to stop Scorpius and destroy his carrier would be to use Talyn. While Crichton provided a distraction, Crais managed to board Talyn and reactivate his higher functions. After convincing Talyn that their sacrifice would save many lives, including Moya's, Crais ordered Talyn to starburst inside of the carrier's hangar. The resulting explosion was devastating, slowly consuming the Command Carrier from within. The sacrifice of himself and Talyn allowed Crais to exact his vengeance on Scorpius, allowed Crichton accomplish his mission and save countless lives, saved Aeryn, whom Crais had come to care for deeply (possibly to the point of love), and allowed Talyn to die nobley and free from Peacekeeper control. Their deaths gave Crais and Talyn the redemption they had long sought.


Though he was dead, Crais would appear again in various forms. Less than a cycle after his death, Crichton encountered an image of Crais inside of a mental video game-like device. This image was in the form of an ogre The ogre-Crais was married to a princess whom looked just like Aeryn.

Crichton would again encounter Crais, this time in an Unrealized Reality. In this reality, Crichton was a Peacekeeper and Crais his commanding officer. After the Peacekeeper Crichton accomplished his mission by inadvertently capturing Moya and killing her crew, Crais embraced him and congratulated him on a job well done.

Character Development

Crais begins the series as a typical villain, chasing the show's hero because of a personal need for revenge. His continued failure to catch Crichton, and the introduction of Scorpius late in the first year leads to a change in Crais. He chooses to leave the Peacekeepers and take Talyn, the product of his most successful project. Crais acts as a mentor, father, and companion to Talyn and tries to teach him peace and discipline. His time with Talyn allows him for a more civil and personal relationship with Moya and her crew.

In the two cycles following his defection from the Peacekeepers, Crais becomes a valuable ally to Moya's crew.

Crais' respect for the Peacekeeper mandates is unclear; at times, he's the flagbearer for military tradition; at other times, he's a renegade. Anything that could be construed as a challenge to his authority terrifies him; he despises Scorpius for almost the same reason he despises Crichton. Like Inspector Javert, Crais simply wants the universe to operate by his rules. And only Crais knows what his rules are.

Because of this, the motives behind his decision to defect from the Peacekeeper military, and his decision to steal Talyn, remain to be fully revealed.

In the penultimate episode of Season 3, Crais uses Talyn to perform a suicidal Starburst inside Scorpius' command carrier. This heroic act of self-sacrifice effectively destroys the Peacekeeper wormhole project, but Talyn and Crais along with it.

External Links

Crais's entry at Farscape-1

Farscape Official Site

Hostage (film)

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Promotional poster for Hostage
Directed by Florent Emilio Siri
Written by Robert Crais (novel)
Doug Richardson
Starring Bruce Willis
Kevin Pollak
Jonathan Tucker
Ben Foster
Robert Knepper
Jimmy Bennett
Michelle Horn
Serena Scott Thomas
Marshall Allman
Music by Alexandre Desplat
Cinematography Giovanni Fiore Coltellacci
Editing by Richard Byard
Olivier Gajan
Distributed by Miramax
Released March 11 2005
Running time 91 min
Language English
Budget $50 million (estimated)
IMDb profile

Hostage is a 2005 action/thriller movie which was directed by Florent Emilio Siri. The film was based on a novel by Robert Crais, and was adapted for the screen by Doug Richardson.

Tagline: Would you sacrifice another family to save your own?


After a failed hostage situation which resulted in the gruesome deaths of three people, veteran LAPD hostage negotiator Jeff Talley leaves Los Angeles with his family to become police chief in Bristo Camino, a peaceful suburban hamlet in Ventura County, California.

One year after the incident that ended his career with the LAPD, Talley finds himself in yet another hostage situation. Two teenagers and their mysterious accomplice Mars Krupchek take hostage Walter Smith and his two young children in Smith's house after a failed robbery attempt. Unwilling to put himself through yet another life-or-death situation, Talley hands authority over to the Ventura County Sheriff's Department and leaves the scene.

Unfortunately for Talley, Smith has been laundering money for a mysterious criminal syndicate through offshore shell corporations. He was preparing to turn over a batch of important encrypted files (recorded on a DVD) when he was accidentally taken hostage. To protect such incriminating evidence from discovery, the syndicate arranges for Talley's family to be taken hostage, and forces him to return to the scene and stall for time until it can mobilize its own attack against Smith's house.

Back at the scene, Talley learns that Mars is a serial killer, who could turn on the hostages and his own accomplices at any moment. The rest of the movie's plot turns on whether Talley can save two families while fighting two separate groups of hostage-takers at the same time.

According to the movie's official production notes, the movie's plot is roughly the same as the novel; the main difference is that a complicated subplot involving the Mafia was removed and the ages of the first group of hostage-takers was lowered slightly. In the novel, Smith's employer is Tony Benza, a crime overlord whose influence reaches throughout the entire West Coast.


Location details

Bristo Camino is a fictional town (though apparently intended to be a parody of Ojai or Moorpark). According to the production notes, most of the movie was actually filmed in the Malibu area (in western Los Angeles County). The exterior views of Smith's lavishly appointed house were filmed at a real house in the unincorporated Topanga Canyon area, between Malibu and Los Angeles; the interior scenes were done on soundstages in Hollywood.

The movie's opening scenes were filmed in the Boyle Heights neighborhood of Los Angeles, just east of downtown.


Mars Krupcheck: [leaning in really close to Jennifer when she's tied up]What's the best day of your life? [looks at him, scared, and doesn't say anything]
Mars Krupcheck: You don't know? [shakes her head]
Mars Krupcheck: Mine's today.


Jeff Talley: [Jeff Talley on the cell phone whilst talking to the 'FBI' agent] Go ahead. Kill my family. Kill me. Before you do, let me get to Smith's house and I'm gonna box up all that dead motherfucker's DVD's and you and the feds can bid on it on eBay! How's that, smart fuck?

External links

I'm thinking the cheater who has us mired in a phoney war gone bad - thinks somewhat along the lines below. You have to think - he's nuts and that he wants Armeggedon now.

Ethnic stereotypes in pornography

Something to ponder - eh?

Childproofing the House

Before your child is crawling, walking and becoming a lot more mobile, it would be a good time to child proof your house. Get down on all fours and search the house for potential hazards to your child.

Remember that in addition to childproofing your own home, make sure that your child safe at daycare or when visiting friends and family. Do grandparents have medicines out of reach? Does your neighbor have a gun in the house?

Here are some tips for childproofing your house:
  1. Use covers on electrical outlets and latches on cabinets.
  2. Set the temperature of your hot water heater to 120 degrees F to prevent scalding burns.
  3. Prevent poisoning by keeping household cleaners, chemicals and medicines completely out of reach and always store them in their original container and know your local Poison Control Center number (1-800-222-1222). Also, buy and use products with child resistant caps.
  4. Make sure that used or hand-me-down equipment, such as car seats, strollers, toys and cribs, etc., haven't been recalled for safety reasons. Call the manufacturer or the Consumer Product Safety Commission for an up-to-date list of recalled Products (800-638-2772 or
  5. Use stair gates and window guards.
  6. See the Lead Poisoning Guide or take our Lead Screening Quiz to see if your child is at risk for lead poisoning.
  7. Maintain smoke free environments for your children.
  8. Remove mobiles from the crib and playpen once your child can stand.
  9. Install smoke and carbon monoxide detectors and fire extinguishers in the house and use flame retardant sleepware.
  10. Install fire extinguishers and consider purchasing flame resistant or flame retardant furniture in your home.
  11. Remove furniture with sharp edges or use soft guards.
  12. Use nonskid backing on rugs and make sure carpets are securely tacked down.
  13. Remove breakables from low tables and shelves.
  14. Remove small toys and other choking hazards from around your child.
  15. Tie cords of blinds, curtains and appliances up out of reach or use a blind cord wind-up device. Remove loops from blinds.
  16. Do not use a mobile baby walker. Stationary walkers are much safer.
  17. Do not carry hot liquids or food near your child and do not allow your child near stoves, heaters or other hot appliances (especially curling irons). When cooking, use the back burners and turn pot handles inward.
  18. To prevent drowning, empty all water from bathtubs and pails, keep the door to the bathroom closed and never leave your child alone near any container of water.
  19. In the bathroom, use a lid lock on the toilet, a non-slip mat on the tub floor and consider a cushion for the tub faucet.
  20. Child proof the swimming pool by enclosing it in a fence with a self-closing and self-latching gate and never leave your child alone in a swimming area, even if he is a good swimmer.
  21. If you must have a gun in the house keep it and the bullets in a separate locked place.
  22. Be cautious of certain dog breeds (Rottweilers, pit bulls, German shepherds) that account for over fifty percent of fatal dog bites and closely supervise children when in the presence of animals.
  23. If using bunk beds, remember that kids under age 6 years of age should not be allowed to sleep in the upper bunk.
  24. Make sure your house is free of enviornmental health hazards, such as radon, carbon monoxide, asbestos, mercury and mold.
  25. If considering buying a trampoline, keep in mind that the American Academy of Pediatrics recommends that 'parents should never purchase a home trampoline or allow children to use home trampolines' and that even when supervised, children under age 6 years should not be allowed to use a trampoline.
  26. Place childproof covers on doors that your child could use to leave the house.
  27. Keep a list of emergency numbers near the phone and keep a phone handy at all times in case of an emergency.
  28. Lock rooms (with a childproof lock or door knob cover) that are not childproof and the exterior doors of your house so that your child can't get out the front door or into the garage, attic, or backyard without help.
Hidden Dangers
  1. Consider using a wall anchor or safety strap for the stove and large pieces of furniture that can tip over.
  2. Do not place your TV on a cart that could easily tip over onto your child.
  3. Consider a lock for the dish washer (so he can't reach unsafe items, like steak knives, that you might be washing) and refrigerator.
  4. Secure (keep out of reach of your child) your car keys and lock your car so that your children can't get locked in the car or the trunk.
  5. Consider getting a trunk release mechanism so that your child can't get trapped in the trunk.
  6. Remove the rubber knob or tip from door stops, as younger children can choke on them, or just use a one piece door stop.
  7. To prevent finger injuries, use a finger pinch gaurd on doors.
  8. Secure the key for a gas fireplace or consider using a valve cover.
  9. Use a guard on bannisters and railings, especially if your younger child can fit through the rails.
  10. Remove the hood and neck drawstrings from your child's jackets and other clothing, as they can get caught in school bus doors, handrails and playground equipment, etc. Also warn your child about using dangling key rings and hanging things from their backpacks, as they too can get caught and injure your child.

Random enough? Let me know - Sparks